I have a friend with a daughter-in-law. She is an activist in the area of the environment. When Trump was elected she wanted her church to denounce Trump, seeing him as anti-environment. Her church refused. And Megan left the church. I don’t blame her for leaving. The reality is the church failed Megan.
The church was not a place or community to which Megan belonged. The church was something she simply attended. The problem is not (entirely) the fault of the people attending; the problem is the way the church does church. It fosters attending; it does not advance belonging. The Church carries most of the blame.
One reason churches foster attending is because of their Sunday structure. Most services on Sunday revolve around a single person. Usually this person is the pastor or priest, and when it comes to mega-churches, he is probably a charismatic figure—creating a cult of personality, of sorts. In the case of smaller churches, this figure may not be charismatic, but central none-the-less. People come to hear the pastor speak. They are reduced to the role of spectators who come to hear the speaker. That is, they attend.
In some churches there is the additional element of the worship band, which transforms Sunday morning into a time of entertainment. When we go to an event to be entertained, we are attending. Yes, I know that many believers are genuinely engaged in worship through the music (and it’s not about being entertained), but they are attending worship. The key word is “attending.” Belonging is not the purpose.
The bottom line is this: Church is something we go to. Something we attend. It’s not about belonging.
I think most reasonable people intuitively know that church should be a place of belonging. And most people know they need a place to belong. Given the way things are, however, most people accept the church as something you attend. They accept it as is because they fear the alternative. They fear belonging. It’s easier not to confront our fears. This is our part in the problem.
A friend talked about a new movement coming to the church. He heard this idea from someone else, but neither of them knew what this movement would be. If I may venture a suggestion, I think the new movement will be a trend toward belonging (and away from attending).
(The Church) rejects the notion that earthly or secular public life is the only kind of public life, but instead holds that heavenly public life (that is, life lived out on earth whose source is “from above”) is true public life – life that is natural to the original nature of mankind as created in God’s image.
—Boyd Morris | Bishop of Basileia Alliance | The Basileia Abbey of St John
Before this movement can begin, however, the people of the Church will need to confront their fears, and say, “I am ready to belong. I want to belong.” Such courage only comes by God. God will need to do a work in his people to infuse them with courage. Once the people are ready to face their fear, they will need to require that the church do things differently, that the Church prioritize belonging.
What does this belonging look like? There’s no easy answer to this question, but here are three possibilities:
First, change the Sunday services so that their purpose is not about luring in spectators. Instead, Sunday would be geared toward cultivating connections between those who come regularly.
Second, Christians should make the practice of their faith a public matter. The concept of a “private life” is a modern myth that many Christians have sadly embraced, which leads to a mindset where it is acceptable to act in the “flesh” Monday through Saturday in ways that are contrary to the Spirit (of Sunday). Sunday becomes a temporary, private excursion from the rest of our secular week.
Third, encourage and practice authenticity. Engagement on Sundays is limited in general, and when it does exist, it is rarely more than superficial. Most churches want to foster anonymity for those who attend, making it possible to come and leave without “exposure” or connections. Churches need to encourage their people to get real with one another, and drop the barriers or facades. Some who attend won’t want to be a part of this, and may not return as a consequence. It’s sad, but most people avoid the thing they need the most. In this case—belonging! It may be that we need to create other experiences for these people, either on Sunday morning or other days of the week.
A place where people belong, now that sounds like a church—a community of people. Jesus opts to refer to his people with a different word than “synagogue,” which would have been the natural term to use given his Jewish background. Instead, he uses the word “ecclesia.” This new term means “gathering,” which implies more than attending. It suggests belonging. He wanted his people to belong to one another.